I’m really open about our family, adoption journey, and my love for my kids. I’ve even written and published several articles on this site. I’m very tolerant of questions, even from strangers who mean well or simply are curious. I have amazing patience, usually. And then there are times…
Does anyone else have a family of special circumstances? Adoption? Inter-racial? Disabilities? If you do, then you know exactly what I’m talking about. That day when a question just hits you wrong. Maybe you sense something off. Maybe a stranger approaches you during a family fun day for which you paid a ton of money for admission, but sucked it up in the name of family fun, only to ask you one more time something very personal when you’d rather wave and encourage your child spinning out of control on a ride she just mustered the courage to try?
This person approached me wanting to share her family story, which I could relate to. Again, I’m so used to this. When we’re not in our home community, it’s almost a sure bet that I’ll get approached. While I’m happy to talk about my kids and help other people understand the reasons for our decisions, please respect the fact that my kids can hear you and/or are in need of my attention too.
photo credit: ruthieonart
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When my son joined our family, I ran into many people who seemed to think he was community property, rather than a precious part of our unique family. He was 6 mo. when he joined our family and was from S. Korea; I had strangers and near strangers, not to mention acquaintances wanting to hold him. This really bothered me. I have 3 bio kids, generally I found, people just don’t ask/want to hold someone elses infant. I had a woman at a public rest area on the side of the highway try to touch and hold him, it was quite unnerving.
Ewww. That would be very unnerving DeeDee. I can’t wait to see you next week! I can’t believe it’s been a year and a half.
Amen, Beth. I often wonder what my girls think when people ask, right in front of them, how they were concieved. I am amazed at how many people are stunned to learn that my singleton was concieved IVF. They’re like, “Really? I’ve never heard of anyone getting one baby from In-Vitro!” Yeah, that’s because you don’t ask parents of singletons how their child was concieved.